Geriatric Rock Update

When last we spied Professor Bunkum’s colostomy sack making its way through the express lane at BevMo, he was muttering something about the upcoming 3 Guitar Heroes show featuring Schenker, Roth (Uli Jon not David Lee, cheese) and man Mountain Leslie West.  Alas it was not to be, as it appears from the Interweb that the tour was booked before anyone realized that the fact that West recently had his leg amputated might be a problem for ingress and egress into venues, busses, potties, etc.  Nevermind that Schenker may or may not be in control of himself for the next 12 hours and that Frank Marino is driving Uli Roth to Randy Hansen’s house to score some acid from Jimi Hendrix.  Roth and Schenker are the kind of guys who uphold their ends of a bargain.  Amputee West is the real contract breaker.  Bring in Graham Nash I say. 

So anyway, ya, there goes the trifecta of Ancient Metal shows we spewed about last month.  Nevertheless, UFO held their own recently (against who? The social security crowd at the Rainbow?) with Vinnie Moore proving that he is no Michael Schenker clone.  No sir.  Moore might hit all the notes in Schenker’s memorable melodies, but he throws in a few atonal guitar wank squawks anywhere he can, just to show he bows to no German.   Phil Mogg spent the night hunkered over, with a bad choice of suspenders, skinny old man jeans and cropped hair that made him look like he could be on Medical at any minute.  The real star of the show was drummer Andy Parker, who is solid in a Bonham sort of way. Unfortunately YouTube clips of the “classic” UFO lineup reveal that Parker’s tempo ain’t what it used to be, so the show lacked a bit in the drive department.  

Despite my whining, let me reiterate, if it’s not apparent (and it’s not), that this was a good show.  I liked it.  It seemed a little thin on slow numbers (maybe Mogg’s voice was going out), but it rocked in a way most things don’t rock anymore (unless you frequent GYPSYHAWK or HOLY GRAIL shows).  (Oh ya and my fave underdogs BASTARD.)

Speaking of GYPSYHAWK, that show they did with Tad’s new band was something.  Tad is definitely sending the message: if you go to see Tad, don’t expect Tad.  Wow, what a wash of noise, but good on ya Mate, hope you got enough gas money to git up the road a bit.  And a girl bass player wife (I mean “partner”) in the grand tradition of Judas Priest!  Nice I say.

So this week we have MICHAEL MONROE coming up.  I’m really gonna try to arrange my parole so that I can make this show.   I’m pretty sure two kids under 10 can handle themselves in a locked car in Hollywood, right?  They know how to use a cell phone if anything happens.  There just aren’t enough bands playing two guitar based melodic rock/punk/garage glam for me to miss this show.  One at the Whiskey and one somewhere in the OC the night before.  If Deadboys/ Dictators/Johnny Thunders/Stooges/(some)Stones/(some)Aerosmith/Ian Hunter ain’t your bag, then your bag is missing a couple of sex glands.  I hope to see some of you there.